The Miami Dolphins Water Your Waiting For

2017 is the year postmodernism exceeded its data plan while snapchatting its benzodiazepine overdose. The dead no longer roll over in their graves because it's too inconvenient. The spectre of communism works part time at Disneyland's Haunted Mansion. The President of the United States swipes left for the EPA and right for rubles. It's not funny that it's funny, and it's funny that it's not funny. And what better soundtrack than FPE's latest release from Miami Dolphins, Water Your Waiting For. Right out of the gate, the Dolphins start and stop and change directions quicker than you can scroll through your Facebook feed. Versatile vocals careen between Trout Mask Replica guitarisms and drumisms and arc across the brightest colors of some weird no wave punk rainbow--with feeling! The whole thing's a toothy grin smiling with the vitriol gnashing of Mark E. Smith and the unapologetic country funk of D. Boon's six string. It's the mercurial mirth of Deerhoof, the mechanical satire of DEVO, the angular paranoia of early Talking Heads. It's all those times you wanted Gang of Four to crack a joke or wished Frank Zappa and Jello Biafra didn't need to tell you how smart they are. Water Your Waiting For may not singlehandedly eradicate global warming, elect a socialist leader of the free world, cure mobile phone dependency, steer news consumption back on course, or dismantle ISIS, but if 2017 knew what was good for itself, it would take some cues from Miami Dolphins and get going on its good foot.